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Monday, April 30th, 2007
10:52 pm - sadness and cliche post
Heya all!

After years of no entries and using my LJ account strictly to lurk and read my friends’ LJs, here I am writing. I am making this post in the full knowledge that there are scores, probably hundreds of LJ posts almost exactly like it. My post will be so completely unoriginal as to be a cliché. Also, its message will tell you something you all already know and have heard many times, from an early age on. It’ll be about as informative as telling you that you really shouldn’t hit those smaller than you and not to take things that aren’t yours. And yet, I will post it anyways.

current mood: sad

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Monday, November 18th, 2002
6:59 pm - and again, my random iTunes DJ has perfect timing
Element of Crime lyrics are among the things I would count as valid reasons to learn German. This song is one of the few that doesn't get too critically damaged in translation by losing the rhyming or the completely intranslatable playing around with and twisting around of words and common expressions.

It also just came on randomly on iTunes, and it just worked so well with some things I have been thinking and talking about lately, it made me cry.

All That We'll Take Along

The glass from which you never drank
The kitchen junk that noone needs
And the plastic fruit off of which you optically feed
All that we'll take along
And you too
The piano that you cannot play
The unwashed dishes that you always put off
And the chocolate that you consume in hospital amounts
All that we'll take along
And me too

I want your hand
I want you mouth
I want your head
I want your tongue
I want your hair
I want your skin
And all that nonsense
I want too

The hopes that you never gave up on
The anger that never quite died down
And the confused dreams of which nothing is left in the morning
All that we'll take along
We need that too

I want your hand
I want you mouth
I want your head
I want your tongue
I want your hair
I want your skin
And all that sorrow
I want too

The mistakes that you cannot change anymore
The words that you regret
And the nights in which you didn't know where to go with yourself
Those we won't take along
Those we'll leave here

Oh man. If it only were that easy.

current mood: wistful

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Monday, November 11th, 2002
2:27 pm - (this is the sound of a huge weight dropping off my chest)
Application Review Agreement

By checking this box, I confirm that I have completed and reviewed my application and I am satisfied with its content and format. I certify that the information in this application, and in other materials that I submit, is correct to the best of my knowledge. I understand that after I submit my application in accordance with the procedures set forth below, I will be unable to make any further changes.

Note: Checking this box confirms that you have viewed and are satisified with your application. You will still be able to make changes until you submit your application to HHMI.

(check box)

Application Submission

Submit Application

(click Submit Application)

Your application was submitted on November 11, 2002 at 5:04 PM Eastern Standard Timeo

current mood: ecstatic

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Wednesday, October 23rd, 2002
6:43 pm - happy things
It must have been a good combination of caffeine, sunshine, and hormone levels... I felt really happy today. These days, I alternate between abject horror at the thought that I will be living in La Jolla for the next 6 years, and profound joy at being a part of the UCSD Neuroscience program.

So today was one of the latter... being here just sorta feels like it was being at Hopkins Marine Station (I guess the more logical conclusion I could draw is that being at Hopkins is kinda like being in grad school), where everyone around me was also a bio geek. It was almost like some sort of sect. Now it's like that again. Only here people are actually even all neuroscience geeks, not just bio geeks. Actually, that doesn't mean that the "everyone here is in my fie ld" feeling is any stronger than at Hopkins, though. I feel about as "distant" from the physiology and molecular and computational folks as I did to the ecology and zoology and evolutionary folks at Hopkins. In fact, I could do with a few ecologists and z oologists here... they'd be fun to have around.

But the overall feeling remains one of being in this weird yet very enjoyable biology subculture. I guess that kind of separatism is not exactly advanced or broad-minded or cool. But I have to admit, it simply is fun to be around folks whose lunch conversations will alternate between this weekend's football game and the latest news from brain imaging, or between where to go dancing in the area and how they learned RNA extraction today. It's just this happy feeling of "hey, there are others who think this is cool!"

I'm sure that must happen to other people when they're with other folks from their field... right?

And then, it's not like I would ever want to exclusively hang out with only bio/neuro folks. I'm still dating a Russian major, most of my friends are some flavor of CS/engineering, and my favorite roomie here is an International Relations gal. It's just that it's nice to *also* have a whole bunch of neuro people to talk to all of a sudden.

Anyhoo. Narrow-minded or not, it made me happy today.


current mood: geeky

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3:21 am - yay!
Robert Sapolsky is a Mac user!

And if you have any idea why that would make me unreasonably happy, you know me too well.

current mood: silly

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Monday, October 21st, 2002
12:28 am - resistance is futile
So I promised myself I would never do this. No way, I said, I stopped writing in my diary long ago because I never had time for it, and I am already wasting wayyy to much of my rare free time at the computer (and not doing anything productive either), so n onononono. No livejournal for me. Anyways, do I really want any ol' person online to see what I write in my journal? Isn't the appeal of writing in a journal that it's private?

But then I moved away, and I miss all my friends, and then someone po inted out to me that a lot of them are right here, on livejournal. And it's such a great way of keeping tabs on what's up in their lives... and staying close to them at least a little bit... and I figured, great, I'll just lurk. But whoever knows me knows that I couldn't possibly read my friends' journals without wanting to comment... and I didn't want to keep commenting as "Anonymous"... and some friends' journals I couldn't even view as a non-member... oh, and what the hell, why pretend, I am too much o f an exhibitionist not to feel the appeal of this thing.

So here I am. Beware, posting will be infrequent and random. And my deepest darkest thoughts won't go up here (the number of people I'll share them with shall remain carefully limited). But I might just let off steam here every once in a while, or share some joy, or just put up some random deliberations.

Hmm. That's a thought I hadn't considered. This is a place where I can post all these random musings on life and the universe and all the rest wi thout boring someone of of their skull or having them beg me to stop lecturing! Wheee! If people don't care (I bet most won't), they can just skip it. But I'll get to sort my thoughts out somewhere. And maybe every once in a while someone will read it and actually care. Or even agree. Or disagree, and tell me about it, and make me think about it in a whole new way.

Wow. That might even be cool.

Okay, but now it's homework time for me.{

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